Guilt can be a huge barrier in being assertive, especially for a people pleaser. It makes us question our choices and wonder if our internal rules are somehow flawed. We may feel responsible. We may not want to disappoint someone. We may not want to hurt their feelings.
By definition, fawning refers to the flattery or affection displayed to gain a favor or advantage. Fawning is the opposite of the fight response. Instead of aggressively attempting to get out of a dangerous situation, fawn types attempt to avoid or minimize confrontation. They do this through what is referred to as ‘people pleasing’, where they bend over backward trying to be nice. It is not done to be considerate to the other individual but as a means of protecting themselves from additional trauma.